Mankind has perpetuated evil over and over and over again. When will we stop? When will it end?

Genocide definition: “a form of one-sided mass killing in which a state or other authority intends to destroy a group, as that group and membership in it are defined by the perpetrator.”

– Frank Chalk and Kurt Jonassohn, The History and Sociology of Genocide, 1990

The latest genocide to occur in Rwanda began on April 6, 1994 and lasted for 100 days. During that time, over 1,000,000 people were killed simply because they were identified as Tutsi. No one was exempt. The killing was brutal and slow. Most of the killing was done house to house by neighbors with farm implements: the favorite tool was a machete.

At the memorial site that I visited, there are over 250,000 buried here in mass graves. And a grave is left open because more will be received.

It is peaceful and silent. And very, very sad.

The sadness overcomes me when I see thousands of photographs of loved ones gone. Cases of bones and skulls; and then another with smaller skulls and bones that can only belong to children. Clothes that had been worn by those murdered. Graphic pictures of death, dying and torture. It all serves to overwhelm the observer. But these images also remind us that we must never forget.

There is a memorial in each district. In some cases it is the finest building to be seen. But the dead here are loved and not forgotten and are deeply missed. Any of us who have ever lost someone we cherished miss them deeply. Most of those we remember were not brutally removed from our lives.

When you add brutality to death, one must tread very carefully in saying, “I understand.” I do not know their grief. But I know it is theirs alone and so we can stand with them in respect and silence to acknowledge their pain and loss.

In Rwanda, 100,000 people sit in prison waiting to be tried for their crimes during the genocide. These are not high security prisons. They are made out of brick and many times I saw prisoners, dressed all in pink, walking along the road, working, waiting.

In many cases they subsist on very little food and are sick. Their families visit them and bring them food. These prisoners are neighbors, friends, people who murdered people they knew and shared a meal and a life together prior to April 1994. And the Rwandese insist on justice.

Within the culture there is a community dispute resolution system called Gacaca (ga-cha-cha). It was originally established for settling community disputes and transgressions. It has been modernized to be used for the trials and reconciliation of the people of Rwanda.

In a gacaca, the alleged perpetrators are brought before the community and members of the community testify to what they witnessed. One of the purposes of the gacaca is for the relatives of the dead to forgive the murderer. The Rwandan people believe that forgiveness is key to rebuilding this nation.

In the last few years President Kagame has issued new identity cards which no longer specify Hutu, Tutsi or Tua. They are all Rwandese.

If anyone teaches differently, speaks differently or acts in the old system they are immediately prosecuted (in theory). The message though is clear and strong: we are all Rwandese.

A young man I met was 18 at the time of the war (or genocide). He left for Canada to get away from the pain and memories. And he tried to forget what happened.

And then two years ago he realized he had stopped living and needed to forgive those he knew that murdered his best friend in front of him. And through his efforts to forgive (which is an ongoing process), he is healing and he knows he survived for a reason.

Can you imagine forgiving someone you watched brutally murder your loved one, or possibly your entire family??? I know for sure it’s possible to do this. I have seen it. But it takes faith in God, true love for another and an ability to ask the question, “How do I go on?” versus “Why should I go on?”